Posts

Ups and Downs

I'll be posting up some articles soon which are more straight informative things about mental health, what it is, what and who can help, that sort of thing. But for now I'll bring you up to date with how I'm doing since my first post. I can say it's ups and downs. Thought when I say that the ups are periods of time where I don't feel miserable, not happy, just sort of a bit numb at the moment. The downs are still pretty low. Feelings of lonliness, frustration, disappointment. I won't lie once again I've had thoughts wondering if anyone would miss me if I wasn't here anymore. I'll admit I've taken one afternoon off work at short notice so I didn't end up sitting at my desk in the office crying. I do have a direction now in terms of my job and know what kind of thing I'm looking to get into. That is good and it is the first time I've really had a direction rather than just drifting from job to job. This is the positve I need to ...
Post a Comment
Read more

It starts with a Facebook post.

This journey starts with a Facebook post. Recently I had something of a meltdown. A big crack in my mental health that left me feeling really low. Sat on the floor of my living room with what felt like a void deep inside me. It's not the first time I've felt it. Although it wasn't the worst I'd felt it. I've had darker days, ones when I've asked myself "If I wasn't here anymore would anyone miss me?" I wouldn't say I've had serious thoughts about suicide but nor can I deny that I've had the odd moment when the thought or something in the direction has flickered through my mind. My recent crack was the eruption of a lot of different things that had been combined to make me unhappy. Things which I'd not been dealing with properly, things which I kept avoiding directly facing as I pretended to the world that nothing was wrong. Always saying "Good, thanks" when asked how I was doing. It was rarely, if ever, actually true...
Post a Comment
Read more